I'm going out west! It has been a long process to get to this point emotionally, financially, and logistically. Alex and I started talking about farming last summer, as we planned and planted our little community garden plot. It has been a constant thought and a constant dream for over a year and it is something that surprised me when it came to me. I never thought I wanted a simple life. That is until I realized how complicated life could get. I want to be able to make the world a better place and literally watch the fruits of my labor blossom and grow.
We've been looking in a directory of farms put out by World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms, USA. Initially, we were looking at Hawaii but our intention was to stay where we went for a while and from all accounts Hawaii is a good place to visit but not a very easy place to live. So the next logical place, the west coast, became our focus. After a long process of elimination, constant correspondence, minor (and major) disappointments, and lots and lots of anxiety, frustration, misapprehension, and hopefulness we came to be in contact with Westwind Farm in Port Angeles, Washington. Alex was immediately stoked and I was slow on the draw but once I read about and corresponded a little more with the lovely proprietor, Jane, the more I became excited too. It began to become real. Then two days ago we spoke with her over the phone and felt a really good rapport with her which just cinched things for us.
So yesterday, without hesitation or second thought (because I couldn't allow myself or I would have thrown up) I informed my two wonderful bosses that I would be leaving Mississippi Market Co-op, the place that I had shopped, worked, and loved for 4 years. My last day is May 9th and I am still in shock, as I'm sure are others, about it. I will miss terribly the community and the people I have called home and made such a part of myself and there will be a big hole in my heart for a while. I came across a song today, while organizing my music library for our trip, which expressed my love and sorrow about traveling so far away from the people and places I've grown to love so dearly over the past 7 years. Here are the lyrics:
I heard love can fall so hard, it can bury a kingdom
I heard it makes the spring appear out of season
It's a storm in a shadowbox, a force to be reckoned with,
When it finds you and find you, it will.
And I'd not believed it til I loved, I love
The rivers sing and stars awaken above me
And the wind and the moon in fits of restless conspiring
Turn night to heaven for you.
But I am going to a far, far land
I know it sure as I've a past and a future
With my maps on the table, you see, I have lost many things
So many I won't turn back.
And were I a deadwood ship, my heart a compass
I would leave with inanimate grace, no love could touch me
But I live and I know that I'll burn as I grow
Though it might break my heart to walk away and so
As a moon may adore you and remain, high moon
The wind may crown your head with leaves, and keep blowing
So I'll stop and I'll watch you, for I love, I love
And then be on my way. And then be on my way.
Thank you, Dar Williams for expressing my feelings how I could not yet.
Here's to the planning of and count down to an adventure of a life time, and a farewell to the who and what which has gotten me here.
P.S. By the way, today is Jane's birthday and Earth Day. Happy birthday to her and to everyone else: